12 Movies So Bad They’re Good26

By Dan Berry, Dec 09, 2010 in Pop Culture, Son of a Pitch

12 Movies So Bad They’re Good

We have all found ourselves, at least on one occasion, thinking, “Why on earth did I watch this movie? That’s two hours of my life I’ll never have back! I mean, seriously, who gave the green light to this cinematic piece of crap!” Conversely, we have also all sat through a movie that was so bad, so completely god-awful, that it was actually good. This hilarious paradoxical incongruity is what’s at the heart of the series Son of a Pitch, where two producers pitch really bad (but funny) movies to a Hollywood executive. The show is so true to life because, as I said, we have all found ourselves wondering who financed a script about African-American Nazis or a movie about child-custody battles that feature arm wrestling.

But, for those rare moments where bad taste breeds pure entertainment, here are 12 movies so friggin’ bad they’re absolutely awesome.

Son Of A Pitch – Werewolf In A Girl’s Dormitory

12. Reefer Madness (1936)

Refer Madness is sheer madness. It is without a doubt one of the funniest films I have ever seen, and to think that it was apparently a Christian produced film made in the 1930′s to teach the youth of America about the “dangerous narcotic” that is marijuana, pot, or “reefer.” The film plays like one of those horrendously bogus educational videos we were forced to sit through in high school health class, with virtues and ideals that are one-sided and biased to the point of inspiring unparalleled laughter and skepticism. This film tried to teach me many things: Weed can lead to incurable insanity; Weed can make people hallucinate and attempt rape; Weed can turn teens into axe-wielding murderers capable of hacking their entire families to pieces; Weed is “a violent narcotic – an unspeakable scourge – and the Real Public Enemy Number One!”

Watch: Reefer Madness Trailer

11. The Last Dragon (1985)

Why is this movie a small little gem of inanity? Well, for starters, it’s about an eager and pious martial artist named Bruce Leroy. Second, Mr. Leroy is on an endless quest for the most secret of martial art techniques, one that’s called “The Glow,” which I can only presume is a strange illumination that surrounds one’s body, transforming them into a highly enlightened being, kind of like Highlander’s “The Quickening.” Third, and finally, there’s the love interest/pop singer Vanity. (Whatever happened to her career?) Along the way, our young hero must come to grips with a few life-altering things – like dealing with his virginity and how to be “black” – all while stuck in a world that is one giant, glorified pop music video. Needless to say, The Last Dragon is a kick-butt and carefree mishmash of retro cheese all the way.

Watch: The Last Dragon Trailer

10. Battlefield Earth (2000)

Show me a person who can sit through the first 10 minutes of Battlefield Earth without cracking a smile, and I will be amazed, because you’ve just shown me a person that does not exist.

After his post-Pulp Fiction comeback, John Travolta took a giant step backwards in this partial adaptation of his own personal Jesus Christ, L. Ron Hubbard’s sci-fi novel. Set in the year 3000, a millennium after the Psychlo master race invades Earth and enslaves humanity, Battlefield Earth finds Travolta as a 10-foot-tall alien rocking dreadlocks, nose plugs and KISS boots. Even more over-the-top is his performance, which can only be described as reminiscent of the mad scientist in some crappy old cartoon. And as if the acting and plot weren’t bad enough, nearly every scene is shot at a strange askew angle with bizarre color filters. Even the director, J.D. Shapiro, has made fun of the movie.

Watch: Battlefield Earth Trailer

9. The Black Gestapo (1975)

You don’t need to be a grammar school graduate to instantly realize there are two words in the title that just don’t belong together. But then again, 1970’s blaxploitation flicks are infamous for having offered up some seriously insane stuff (a huge killer penis in Welcome Home, Brother Charles, for example). Still, even with that being said, having black militants style themselves as urban Nazis is just beyond the, well, pale. The story of Colonel Kojah and his storm troopers avenging the ‘hood against The Man, and then succumbing to corruption, suffers the usual exploitation movie problems in the pacing and production departments, but it’s just too bizarre to pass up.

Watch: The Black Gestapo Trailer

8. Showgirls (1995)

In the wake of their smash-hit Basic Instinct, director Paul Verhoeven and writer Joe Eszterhas knew they had to find a new way to shock moviegoers. Their solution — this sensational look at the sleazy world of Las Vegas strips clubs and showgirl casino spectaculars. Sure enough, audiences and critics were shocked. They were shocked at Eszterhas’ laughably “hard-hitting” dialogue about who has nice breasts and who is a whore. They were shocked at Verhoeven thinking the sight of Elizabeth Berkley and Kyle MacLachlan screwing in a neon-lit pool like they were suffering seizures would turn us on. And above all else, they were shocked that this supposedly erotic drama generated nothing but knee-slapping, sidesplitting guffaws. On a positive note, though, it was awesome getting to see Jessie Spano’s big boobies. Plus, the movie did offer up some memorable lines—most of which probably can’t even be printed in Penthouse Forum. Here’s one of my favorite PG-13 quotes: “What is he? A pimp? Only people I know got pimp cars are pimps.”

Watch: Showgirls Trailer

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7. Over The Top (1987)

Comedian Norm Macdonald once aptly described this Sylvester Stallone flick as one that “combined the emotional intensity of a child custody hearing with… arm wrestling!” Now, with that said, this is easily the best film I have ever seen that involves a man who uses arm wresting to reconnect with his son. The laugh fest that is Over the Top clearly cemented Stallone’s reputation for “flogging a dead horse” with plot and characters, right down to the down-on-his-luck everyman that must rise to the occasion and face off against the seemingly unstoppable challenger to achieve ultimate moral and literal victory. And hey, with lines like, “When I get to the table, that person, I don’t care who they are, they’re my mortal enemy. I hate them…” it’s damn near impossible not to like this film’s childishness.

Watch: Over the Top Trailer

6. The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension (1984)

Buckaroo Banzai is a classic “so bad it’s good” movie. I mean, c’mon, how can anyone not love a movie about a physicist/neurosurgeon/rock star/racecar driver (played by RoboCop’s Peter Weller) who saves the earth, with the help of his pals Jeff Goldblum and Ellen Barkin, from a delusional John Lithgow and his army of reptilian aliens? Yeah, that’s right. It’s impossible.

Watch: The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension Trailer

5. Roadhouse (1989)

Forget Ghost and Dirty Dancing. With the obvious exception of the legendary Point Break, this is the late Patrick Swayze’s best movie, even though it’s not a “good” film. Who in their right mind could possibly believe a story about a world-famous bouncer with a PhD in philosophy from NYU? Who cares! Swayze as high-kicking, throat-tearing Dalton is so awesome that you’ll be on your feet cheering every punch and roundhouse kick. And then, of course, there’s Sam Elliot. It’s against Hollywood rules to make any movie that takes place in the South or the West without Sam Elliot.

Watch: Roadhouse Trailer

4. Death Race 2000 (1975)

What some people call exploitative, ultra-violent garbage and toss in a dumpster, I call a misunderstood, heart-felt tale about futuristic racecar drivers that plow over people on the road to victory! Not only that, but how can you call this film wretched refuse when you have a main character (played by the late David Carradine), Doctor Frankenstein, that is dressed all in leather and has to battle his nemesis, Machine Gun Joe (Stallone… again!)? Death Race 2000 is a gloriously mindless celebration of violence and proves that human beings make effective speed bumps.

Watch: Death Race Trailer

3. They Live (1988)

Directed by B-movie master John Carpenter, They Live is, in my opinion, the most absurdly awesome movie ever made. For starters, it stars professional wrestler “Rowdy” Roddy Piper. On that fact alone, it claims the most absurdly awesome crown – but wait there’s more. The plot follows Piper, a drifter who discovers a pair of sunglasses that allow him to wake up to the fact that aliens have taken over the Earth. The film contains some of the most laughable lines ever scripted, although my personal favorite was actually ad-libbed by Piper: “I have come here to chew bubble gum and kick ass, and I’m all out of bubble gum!”

On top of the ridiculous dialogue, They Live features the longest, most ludicrous, most badass brawl in cinematic history. The fight between Roddy Piper and co-star Keith David was only supposed to last 20 seconds, but Piper and David decided to fight it out for real, only faking the hits to the face and groin. They rehearsed the fight for three weeks and Carpenter was so impressed he kept the 5 minute and 20 second scene intact. The epic rumble is so awesome and so absurd that South Park reenacted it blow-for-blow with lovable ‘tards Timmy and Jimmy as the combatants.

Watch: They Live Trailer

2. The Room

No “so bad it’s good” movie list would be complete without Tommy Wiseau’s crap-tastic masterpiece, The Room. This movie is so bad that after its initial screenings, the producers started pretending that they intended for it to be a comedy. In fact, it’s become a cult favorite for bad movie lovers and is still screened in movie theaters across the country. Various plot lines simply don’t make sense, every scene opens with “Oh, hi!” and it showcases some of the worst acting seen anywhere with the possible exception of Drop Dead Fred? So, grab some popcorn and take a seat on the couch to watch one of the best worst movies you will ever see.

Watch: The Room Trailer

1. Plan 9 from Outer Space

This film has everything you need for an amazingly bad movie: Ed Wood Jr. as the auteur, Bela Lugosi as the star (even though the movie was made after his death), a plot that involves both aliens and zombies, and… oh yeah… Vampira! Crowned as the “worst movie ever made” back in the 1980 book The Golden Turkey Awards, this is the most famous Z-grade clunker in movie history… but you have to admit, it’s still super fun to watch. Even with a discernible lack of talent and resources, visionary Ed Wood Jr. staged a true alien invasion epic.

Watch: Plan 9 from Outer Space Trailer

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Dan Berry began writing and performing stand-up comedy while skipping class and drinking heavily at New York University. An inexplicably instant success, he has since appeared in clubs and on college campuses nationwide and is frequently featured on radio and television. Aside from creating the humor site “Jotter of a Rotter” and the internationally acclaimed website “The Prison Kite,” Dan has also lent his warped writing skills to a pair of failed pilots for FX and NBC, as well as to several current network shows that are somehow proving successful in spite of his crazed contributions.